#087: Stop Keeping Score With Your Partner. Feat. Dr Abby Medcalf PHD

Picture of Dr Abby Medcalf

Abby went from being terrible at relationships to being great at them. She’s a psychologist who believes a leopard can change their spots and as a recovering heroin addict, she knows what she’s talking about.

We cover:

  • We’re as happy as our relationship.

  • To be good at relationships takes skills you're not born with but you can learn those skills. 

  • We’re mostly competing for attention and time - turning relationship into work:

    • “You have to pull your weight.”

    • “You have to take this off my plate.”

    • “You have to do your fair share.”

  • Being correct or effective: Which would you choose to have a more peaceful relationship?

  • Competing over Sex, Chores and Money, and what questions to ask your partner to help resolve it & how to reframe you perspective.

  • Abby’s method of: don’t S.A.C. your relationship, instead ask questions.

Mentioned in this episode: The work of Timothy Wilson 

P.S: Back on releasing an episode twice/month now.

Previous
Previous

#088: Making Peace. Lessons From Prisons Feat. Doug Noll

Next
Next

#086: When Self-Help Goes Horribly Wrong and How To Prevent It. Feat. Ginny and Jean Brown